Twitter account @TNG_S8 is posting purported plots to Season 8 of Star Trek: The Next Generation (which, fo course, only aired for seven seasons).
They are hilarious*
(*to Trek fans)
Jun 292010
One Reddit wit adds “Don’t forget all the bad acting.”
Now, let this be a lesson to all the people who don’t “get” Twitter. It is absolutely unparallelled as a method for the instantaneous transmission of pithy remarks and of-the-moment social humour.
(via tdw)
To some people, Twitter is kind of like a popularity game — getting loads of followers is half of the site’s meaning.
Not for Sarah Killen, though, who until yesterday happily tweeted away to just three other people under the alias @LovelyButton.
Then this happened:
Yes, Conan O’Brien decided to follow her (probably because her most-recent tweet was ‘Conan O’Brien is THE SHIT’).
She’s gone from three followers to over 10,000. She’s gone from worrying about how to pay for wedding invites, to getting freebies offered to her. She tweets about going to the Apple store and getting rear-ended, and then about how kind everyone is because they asked if she was okay. Almost $1,000 has been donated by strangers to her Cancer Walk team.
But I suspect she’s also tweeted about some things she wishes she hadn’t. One of her recent tweets is “I hate how careful I have to be” followed by “I keep forgetting that there are actually people reading this now” and “That was extremely stupid of me to say. Magic eraser please?”
Like the best of Conan’s humour, I can’t decide if this was a kindness or a cruelty. It’s somewhat both.
Nov 302009
Oh that pesky character count! I run into it more just with standard cell phone texting, but this is still amusing:
Oh yeah, you can follow us on Twitter @absurdintellect.
So Twitter, which has basically nothing in the way of revenue — at least nothing that I can see — is managing to raise $100 million dollars from venture capitalists who are betting that they can find a way to turn Twitter users into cash flow.
Does this remind anyone of the tech bubble at all, here?
Anyway, these investors are committing $100 million, and they are offering a “valuation” of Twitter that’s in about $1 billion. Which means their $100 million buys them about 10% of Twitter. Good for them.
But, this is problematic, because who is out there with hundreds of millions of dollars, clamouring to buy the other 90% of Twitter?
Or, to take the tack that 37signals is taking:
37signals is now a $100 billion dollar company, according to a group of investors who have agreed to purchase 0.000000001% of the company in exchange for $1.
…
In order to increase the value of the company, 37signals has decided to stop generating revenues. “When it comes to valuation, making money is a real obstacle. Our profitability has been a real drag on our valuation,” said Mr. Fried. “Once you have profits, it’s impossible to just make stuff up. That’s why we’re switching to a ‘freeconomics’ model. We’ll give away everything for free and let the market speculate about how much money we could make if we wanted to make money. That way, the sky’s the limit!”
Too funny.
So, who wants to make Absurd Intellectual an absolutely absurd valuation? After all, if you give me just a single, flat dime in exhange for 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% of the blog, then I’ll be the richest damn person ever. On paper, anyway.
The Stand was always one of my favourite Stephen King books. I’m a sucker for the post-apocalyptic. Now, I’m not the first one to take the “Ooooh, flu pandemic” and equate it to the mythical Captain Trips from that book, but all I did was make a few pointed comments.
You have to admire people who go to the trouble to set up Twitter accounts for Randall Flagg and for Abagail Freemantle, though!
(tip of the hat to Hacks and Wonks)
(Go ahead and click on the animation to see it full size. It’s my first-ever animated gif!)
Apr 232009
Finally, Twitter pays off 
After joining the microblogging site a few weeks ago, I promptly ignored it as much as I could, except I set up the blog so that we would automatically send out Twitter updates — sorry, “tweets” — every time we made a post. I thought that would let Twitterers follow the blog without having to remember to come to the webpage all the time.
But I’m going to try to use it more. First up, when I noticed that we were getting some traffic to my recent update post on Lewis Meme, I figured that we’d been linked back from the film’s creator, but I didn’t see anything on his website.
Aha! It was posted on Twitter. So now I’m following him on Twitter. You can too! Or you can follow us. But there’s really no need to choose. Follow us both!
And, perusing his other posts, I found smething interesting that I’m going to blog about right now!