An open letter to Vanoc concerning the closing ceremonies

 Posted by on 2 March 2010  Modern Life, Music
Mar 022010
 

Dear Vanoc,

Congratulations on the successful Vancouver games. You had  a lot of criticism at the beginning, but you and Vancouver, and Canadians in general really pulled through, so kudos.

But we need to talk about the closing ceremonies.

No, not the floating beavers and dancing Mounties — that was actually pretty funny. I didn’t even mind the girls dressed as maple leaves.

Our talk is about the so-called “party” at the end, and the musical guests you decided to have perform at it.

Did we go back in time to 2004? Because I’m pretty sure that was the last time Nickelback or Avril Lavigne were relevant. Not to mention the pop/punk style of Simple Plan has been played to (I had hoped) death.

I can’t really hate on Alanis, because she’s so badass, but seriously, she hasn’t really done much in the last couple of years other than date Ryan Reynolds.

Your best choice that night was definitely K-os.

Vanoc, I think your problem was that you wanted artists to perform who were internationally known and famous. But I think you really squandered the chance to showcase some Canadian talent that is famous IN Canada.

And, who knows, maybe you tried to get other musicians and they just weren’t into it — I would be pretty bummed. But I hope you at least tried.

So, for posterity, here’s who I would have considered (and possibly badgered until they finally gave in). Artists that, to me, are truly Canadian:

-  The Tragically Hip

- Blue Rodeo

- Metric

- Sam Roberts

- Feist

And those are just the bigger names even in Canada. This isn’t even considering all the indie bands who are a lot lower key.

In closing, I think you did good things, Vanoc. But I think you dropped the ball when you wanted to pander to what the rest of the world knows about “Canadian” music.

Regards,

Amy

(ps. Who would you have liked to see at the games, readers?)

Amy Breen

  • the banana

    K’Naan
    The Hip
    ArcadeFire
    Corb Lund
    Trooper!!

  • Reader

    The Tragically Hip

    - Blue Rodeo

    - Metric

    - Sam Roberts

    - Feist

  • thebanana

    Also:
    The Weakerthans
    A large group of Mounties singing “The Lumberjack Song” :)

  • http://www.atomicrobotdesign.com Mike

    Bob and Doug McKenzie

  • http://www.myspace.com/georgereefah Tdot

    Even artists like Drake and George Reefah from Toronto. Both have gotten major attention globally

  • http://www.absurdintellectual.com/ Grant Hamilton

    I second the motion for Bob and Doug McKenzie.

    But I think the biggest problem — and this was evident in the Opening Ceremony, too — was that there didn’t seem to be any sense of narrative arc. There was no climax. There was a bunch of stuff, all thrown together, with no thought given to “flow.”

    In the Opening Ceremony, although I didn’t watch it all, we had a great climactic moment when the cauldron was lit — despite the malfunction. And then what? Then we had to watch Wayne Gretzky hop on a pick-up truck and drive through the rain for 10 minutes, chased by idiots, just so he could light one outdoors? It was a big old anti-climax. A let down. Imagine being in Olympic Stadium, having everything right in front of you, and then, what? Pause, watch it on the Jumbotron like the rest of the world, and that’s it?

    The Closing Ceremony was just as bad. The flame was extinguished almost as an afterthought, when it could have been the focal point of the night. And after all the hullabaloo, we just have to sit there and watch a few has-beens like a shitty mix tape from 2003 come to life. And then when the K-os dancers are over, what? A disembodied voice just tells you that’s all, it’s over?

    If it was a good show, you’d know it was over. There’d have been a natural arc, and a natural ending. Not just, whoops, we ran out of money to book artists.

    • Eight

      The Opening Ceremony with the pick-up truck was exciting for those of us in Vancouver, watching it in the pub. We tried to discern where exactly he was, and appropriately ran out into the street to get a glimpse of the Great One.

  • Colin

    I was pretty embarassed by the inflatable mounties and whatever…it made us look like backwoods rubes not ready for the world stage, which the previous 2 weeks clearly showed was not the case.

    Big agreement with Sam Roberts, Feist..K’Naan would have been amazing too. Tragically Hip, for sure.

    • http://www.absurdintellectual.com/ Amy Breen

      I’m pretty sure the big production with the beavers, mounties, and everything else was meant to be campy and over-the-top — it was meant to poke fun at the stereotypes surrounding Canada, and I thought it was silly and completely tongue-in-cheek.

  • thebanana

    I want to get me one of those big balloons!

  • Colin

    Maybe you’re right…Pamela Anderson has made a career out big balloons and seems to have done quite well on the world stage.

  • Juel

    I would have shifted the order of events a bit…
    I know the guy has to do his speech and declare the end of the games and the flame goes out…and the music afterwards was supposed to be a celebration I believe…but it didn’t come off that way…
    I would have had all the speeches they had to do, then the music (other choices) and then the last speech and then Neil Young singing and then the flame extiguished, fireworks…the end.

  • Juel

    2nd alternate ending…Celine Dion singing “I Believe” dressed in a flesh colored body suit adorned with tiny golden sparking rings… :p

  • http://patrickjohanneson.com/ Pat J

    While I can’t vote against Corb Lund, my pick would’ve been a Terror of Tiny Town reunion, since (a) they’re from Vancouver, and (b) they could sing their dark, minor-key tune “Burkina Faso” and really creep everyone out.

  • Eight

    I third K’Naan. They played a canned mash-up of his “Waving Flag” with another song of his, at Livecity, and it was not only appropriate but the crowd loved it. Blue Rodeo would have been awesome too, except they were only wanting to perform free shows for the Olympics, so all people could come.

    Great Big Sea would have been great. Or Spirit of the West, to get the party going!

    And some thought as to the some choices?? Come on, Burn It To The Ground, Your Love Is A Lie, Cha Ching? Couldn’t these bands have at least played older songs of theirs that are more appropriate to the theme?

    Had the average Canadian been handed the night’s Menu for appraisal, it would have been pretty easy to see that canoe and pee jokes wouldn’t fly, and Nickelback would send people home before the party got started.