When relationships are too much work, do what the pros do — outsource!

I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that if you’re in the market for this service, you’re probably only going to need it in the short term. But, in the interests of promoting weird ideas, and of not judging them, here goes:

Text My Gf is a service that will send sweet text messages to your girlfriend whenever you like. They have sample messages, or you can personalize them. And you can arrange the schedules so that she doesn’t receive a text when you happen to be with her, too.

One text a day is free, anything more than that is $5-15 a month, which seems a little on the pricey side.

I hope that this is a tongue-in-cheek service. From their FAQ:

Why isn’t there a txtmybf?
Because a man doesn’t measure the quality of his relationship by how often his girlfriend texts him. He has other criteria.

What other criteria?
That was a stupid question.

I’m offended. This site is tasteless and demeaning.
Call the care police.

If you get caught using their service, they suggest the automatic flower-delivery website, SaveMyAss.com.