I’m so glad that I stumbled across a list of the 13 most dangerous monsters ever. I won’t give it away, but the list presents from least dangerous to most dangerous, and Cthulhu, above, is only the second-most-dangerous.
Don’t miss the comments, in which the list’s author entertains a few additions to the list and muses about where he would put them (Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man, for example). I particularly enjoyed the fact that he spends some time actually thinking and reasoning about the positioning on the list, and didn’t just slap it together. His words on vampires:
Now, here’s the thing about regular vampires: they’re fucking lame. They sneak around in the dark and drain blood from people. They talk a big game, sure, and everyone thinks they’re sexy. But is sexy going to protect you from the Wolf-Man? No. The Wolf-Man is going to tear your god-damn head off. Ordinary vampires are equally vulnerable to sorcerous power, which is why the Mummy, whose physical capabilities are on par with a vampire’s, anyway, would still kick the crap out of a vampire.
Do you understand this, Twilight fans? Regular vampires are shit. They can only beat Zombies, Witches, assorted Poltergeists, and Mr. Hyde. That is BARELY BETTER THAN A REGULAR PERSON. Shut the fuck up about vampires.
I have nothing to add.