Cheese of the Week: ‘Co-op Gold’ Marble Cheddar

I recently became a member of my local Co-op store, partly because I always get my gas at one of their outlets, just down the block from my house, and partly because I liked the idea of being a part owner and perhaps getting a cash cheque once a year, and partly just because I like to support local initiatives when I can.

So I’ve been doing grocery shopping there, when I remember (the grocery store isn’t as convenient for me as the gas station is, but I try) and I figured I should try some of their cheese.

I like to try new things, and I like to pretend that I’m fancy, and that sometimes spills over into the cheeses that I review here, but sometimes I just like to carve off a huge hunk of cheap cheese and eat it. This two-pound block of marbled cheddar is perfect for that kind of cheese gluttony.

Although this is a store-brand generic, you can be assured that it’s quality. It has been “tested and approved” by the “Co-op laboratory.” I like the idea of scientists hunched over their microscopes, testing each huge blocks of cheese and giving each a yea or a nay before they are sliced into two-pound rectangles and individually wrapped.

I’m sure it’s not that, but I like the image.

One thing that I like about marble cheese is that it reminds me of a cow — it has that same dappled pattern about it, even though I’ve never seen an orange-and-white cow. So you get the visual stimulation of “dairy” as you slice into it.

And really, marbled cheese is visually pleasing. I don’t know who came up with the idea of it, but they’re a genius.

I’ve loved it since I was a child, even if now I’ll often choose the “plain” orange cheddar on a cheese tray over marble, I’m not exactly disappointed when just marble is left.

As you can see, this marble cheese is a tad crumbly, like most marbles are. Despite the best mechanical efforts, I’m sure, the Co-op Laboratories can’t quite get the white curds to stick together perfectly with the orange curds.

Overall, of course, the cheese is firm and holds together well. It’s easy to cut — not hard — but it holds its form well. I know from previous experience that it’s also a good cheese to melt, on sandwiches, say.

After leaving it out for a little bit, this cheese will develop a bit of an oily sheen, but as far as cheddars go, this marble was quite un-oily.

In my mouth, unfortunately, the cheese is depressingly bland. It feels and tastes slightly like flavoured wax — even the texture reminds me slightly too much of biting accidentally into a softened birthday cake candle.

However, as I alluded to earlier in the post, this is a cheese that’s well-suited to eating enormous amounts of. Because the taste is so mild, you can really cram it down your gullet and not get sick of it.

Also, because it is relatively oil-free, and because it firmly holds its shape even in pretty warm temperatures, this is a perfect cheese to take in a homemade snack pack.

You won’t impress the Queen with it, but it’s a good workhorse cheese for everyday lunches, and it’s always an eyecatcher in the fridge.